The Scent Of Green Papaya

I loved this. Relished it in all it's lushness and slowness, its music and its silent wonder. This movie seems to say to us .. every moment you choose to hold your gaze at life holds the promise of poetry. There is this sweet spot between a nameless calm and a nameless longing. It leaves you stranded there. It's a beautiful place I tell you.

Here is the poem Miu reads out in the end, and shes just learnt how to read.




The spring water,
nestled in a hole in a rock,
shimmers softly when disturbed.

The vibrations of the ground
have given birth to strong waves
which crash together in an irregular swell
on the surface,
without cresting.

If there's a verb meaning "to move harmoniously"
it must be used here.

The cherry trees,
gripped in shadows,
spread out and curl up,
sway and twist,
to the rhythm of the water.

But the interesting thing is that ..
however much they change,
they keep the shape of a cherry tree.




P.S: I might watch it again and will definitely check out the other movies by this director.

Held in the arms of your words

This is life
This is all I want from life
It's the fervour and the tenderness combined.
In the dark, in the ever-falling dark,
we are anchorless adrift but barely notice


from the song "held in the arms of your words" by "tired pony". don't know how it reads but it sounds just beautiful in the song.

Leaves Of Grass

One night
I split my cicada skin
devoured your leaves
knowing no poison,
no love nourishment
in that larval blindness,
a hunger finally true.

a poem from the movie "Leaves Of Grass" faithfully captured to the best of my hearing abilities. And this one is not by Walt Whitman.

and i also loved what follows the poem ..

Maybe what's true is in front of us, and we're moving toward it without even knowing it's there. Once you think you've got it all solved, what's left?

And we don't mind the rain

the last white bird in the rain
is not looking for a shelter
as it flies in auto pilot
the men in yellow hats
hanging high from the scaffolding
are fearless too
the cars with red tops
and blue tops and white tops
sleep silent in the car lot
and i with the eyes of a man
calm from last night's sleep
stand at the window


we are all happy where we are
and we don't mind the rain.

why we watch movies

"I don't think you go to a play to forget, or to a movie to be distracted. I think life generally is a distraction and that going to a movie is a way to get back, not go away."

~~ Ton Noonan

This got me thinking. Am I the escapist ? A realist ? Somewhere in between ? All of the above? Together ? By turns? I know now that in our lives we never are one thing at all times. But I am going to try and fathom anyways.

The movies I look for are about real or imagined people, places and times. Which means all the movies. :). Okay, movies which make you yearn for something, which make you think about your own life and remind you of your many hungers you learnt to live with and not do anything about. The ones which fill you with a mad lust - for poetry, for love and the excursions into the known unknowns of this world. I don't demand that it make me happy only that it should evoke and stir something in me. And yes I am partial to soaring music, beautiful words and lyrical voice overs.

But then you don't need a movie to do that for you. And life is here and you don't need to watch a movie to get into or back to it. Maybe its the same escapism after all, if only of a different kind. You are still getting your highs from watching characters in movies do what you don't, only wished you did.

I don't know if there is one reason why we watch movies. But if there was, what would be yours ?

Where the Wild Things Are

there is this kid - Max. sweet and wildly expressive. needs his love. and is the owner of a private world. and he tells stories. here is the one he told his mom about vampires -

there were some buildings... there were these really tall buildings, and they could walk. then there were some vampires. and one of the vampires bit the tallest building, and his fangs broke off. then all his other teeth fell out. then he started crying. and then, all the other vampires said, "why are you crying? weren't those just your baby teeth?" and he said, "no. those were my grown-up teeth." and the vampires knew he couldn't be a vampire anymore, so they left him. the end.

more than your typical kid's movie. this one is about isolation. and belonging. about being left alone in the snow in a smashed igloo. and sleeping in one big warm happy furry pile. about the pains and the joys of being a kid. about how its easy to love. and how its hard too. about running away from one world to another. and coming back home.

obviously i loved watching it. and i loved what one of the wild things says - "Happiness isn't always the best way to be happy."

medicine for melancholy

late night on friday i remembered that i had a movies-to-watch list. a mental one. so i fish this one out from the list and then the internet and love everything about it. the way the camera looks at the city. the way the characters look at the camera and each other and the city. the way the music kicks in. lovely little moments set to beautiful little pieces of music. sweet. sad. happy. true. could even be you. or maybe not. leave the rest for you to discover.

P.S : Wanted to choose between the two posters. Thought about it. Picked both. :)

Lucky life

Lucky life isn't one long string of horrors
and there are moments of peace, and pleasure, as I lie in between the blows.

~ from the poem Lucky Life by Gerald Stern which I came across while reading a movie review of the same name while the music played with a backdrop of thunder and lightning and also while I was thinking about myself. huh !

monday morning ..

if i was a dog, i would go hide under a bed and stay there all day.
yeah that kinda day.

a little scared of life and full of wonder at this world which just gets up and goes on every morning shaking off the remains of the night. i envy this world, everyone who knows how to go about the business of life. day in. day out. how ? today i don't have a clue. feel like the kid on his first day at school who won't cry but just stay there silently counting hours, minutes and seconds till he can get home. and then look at everyone else and wonder .. how ?

Bruno :-)

photograph by : Nilotpal Shahi

four haikus and a sleepless night

if you can't sleep
you are sleepless
not a poet, please.

~

a blank canvas of a night
doesn't make a poem
what else does ?

~

two pillows
still no pillow talk
what's wrong with these pillows ?

~

a laptop screen at night
is an island of light
and a bug's delight

~

all things that make a happy commute !!!

okay everyone hates it, i know. most days i hate it too. but there comes a day i suspect in every commuter's life when you love it so much you just don't want to get off. today was one of those days. everything went right for once. slept well. got up in time. had a good breakfast at home. caught the bus just in time. didn't forget the umbrella. didn't forget the cellphone. got the window seat. it was not raining. but it looked like it would any moment - the clouds and a happy breeze full of promise. and all the while i kept humming a tune from last night. :)

a memory from years ago when on a late night half empty train i would sing aloud tunelessly into the screaming wind. no one could hear. not even me.

Sleeping Beauty and the Airplane

"Then I contemplated her, inch by inch, for several hours, and the only sign of life I could detact were the shadows of the dreams that passed along her forehead like clouds over water."

~~ from the re-reading of "Sleeping Beauty and the Airplane", one of my favorite short stories from "Strange Pilgrims"

the dog problem I & II

i went for a jog this morning. before i go into the problems, let me just soak up the applause.

applause. applause.

well thank you and i love you too. okay then now lets get to the story. the dog wanted to come too, but he refused to put his leash on. and he'd already had his morning walk with dad. so i didn't take him along. and guess what it rained on my once-in-a-season jogging day. what was i thinking it is a season for rain even more so in mumbai. but i wasn't about to stop this being my once-in-a-season jogging day. so jogging in the rain is fun and the park gets almost empty. there are a few umbrella walkers but no problem navigating around them.

problem one

i come back drenched in rain and found the dog waiting by the door seething in anger. ignored him and went for my bath. came back and saw he'd torn my socks apart. lesson learnt. never ignore an angry dog. always hide your socks before you do.

problem two

caught the dog humping a folded mattress y'day. and he looked in a tearing hurry it seemed. somehow rescued the mattress. have to google for a breeding center in mumbai. for the dog you know.

a long weekend ..

this series is inspired by M's weekend blog. hence the initials for names :)

Thursday

my weekend started thursday mid morning actually when i decided to go back home halfway from the commute to office. formals are a sordid affair anyway but when you get soaked in the rain, you just can't wait to get out of them. and the office might not have been a good place for that. so i came home, made mixed popcorns (chilly surprise with butter pepper) and a big mug of tea. finished my work for the day and promptly applied for a day off on friday. now all office goers agree that there is possibly nothing else which quite matches the feeling.

A and I celebrated N's (S or P for those who know him better) birthday at night. very simple affair - a butter scotch cake, all the leftover alcohol in the house plus doctor's brandy for the birthday boy (the cold spares no one you see) and yes some vanilla ice cream to top the night/early morning. and all the silly things that come on tv late night.


Friday

a very happy morning indeed. chatted with friends, played badminton and then food and sleep. went for "salt" at night and came back home to finish yet another (new) bottle of rum. and all the silly things that come on tv late night again.

Saturday

mom n dad arrived. and the dog too. huge effort picking them up from two different places. "why?" is out of scope of this blog. but then watching the dog check out the town out of the taxi window more than made up for all of it. :)


Sunday

just stayed home. mom's food and tv and football with the dog. he is pretty good i must say even though he doesn't understand all the rules. and yeah all the kids in the building visited just to see the dog. will post a picture of him in the next blog. :)

a well spent sunday ..

went to a national park today .. and it was full of people. marauding picknicking people. people with kids and dogs and enough food to eat and throw away. people who scream out of cars and scare animals and people alike. young kids who drive dangerously. god bless them.

came back home. nadal won the wimbledon again. i don't care if he deserved it. felt sad for brazil a few days ago. i hate the dutch now. i want them to lose to uruguay.

the point is i have very little love for the world today. and i feel like a cynical old man critisizing everything. that's not me but that's okay.

so that was the day.

its raining.

its been raining since i woke up today. all whiteness outside the window. and it was still lashing when i woke up again. merciless and beautiful. so naturally i didn't go to office.
i know this love might go when i step out of the house and try to negotiate the city. so i promise you all i won't. working from home today as you can see. no, really :)

10 items or less

I started this one half way I think. Loved the half I saw. Also loved the half I didn't which I will. Very soon of course. Couldn't resist putting up this poster here. It doesn't matter that I don't know why I felt so good when it was over. Perhaps its the sheer joy of talking to strangers. And that beautiful thing which happens when they cease to be strangers as you are talking. Maybe I loved it so because these days I don't even talk to my friends enough. I know I am happy when I do.

So here is to talking to friends and strangers. And to life.

nothing is wrong with your life

days go by
nights too
you wake up
and fall asleep
and in between
you do things you do
you have everything
you think you need
and know nothing
of what you want
nothing is wrong with your life
nothing.

songs for a lazy sunday afternoon

"each coming night" by iron and wine. some sweetness :)

"black swan" by thom yorke .. for the softest utterance of the f word and other good reasons too:)

"this sweet love" by james yuill. for happiness. pure and simple.

and of course the promise of good food makes you love everything.

the beach ..

" .. never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite, and never outstay your welcome. Just keep your mind open and suck in the experience, and if it hurts, you know what? It was probably worth it."

wow !!! there is a reason why this movie was in my top 5 movies list (way back when when i loved making lists ;)), and i don't even remember the other four right now.

there must be a reason why i loved the movie. maybe its got something to do with the word 'paradise' or maybe the fact that there is no such thing. not really sure why.

or maybe its the reason why we all love certain movies which leave you in a state of joyous bliss .. which make you want to go out and live .. furiously .. riotously ..

so i am going out now ..

official family pic

like karan johar said .. its all about loving your family.

phtograph by : u akula
location : outside pop tates
state : after fire shots

on the weekend sitting on the steps in a mall

a beautiful girl
really beautiful
so i look at her
she doesn't
i keep looking
still nothing
comes along a man
and she goes away
but not before
throwing me a smile
so i smile back.

a good day begins

sent the obligatory sms to the manager

"hi xxxx i would not be able to attend office today.thanks."

been happy since then. :):)

big plans for the day. make a good breakfast. eat it.

order a good lunch. eat it.

sleep and watch movies in between.

switched off the cell.

life is simple. it is today.

a sad day

so many reasons ..

but the biggest one was

my signatures didn't match when it mattered !!!

i am officially depressed now. i mean i am sure everyone else's signatures match all the time. or at least they don't don't match as many times as mine.

:(:(:(

there is such a thing as handwriting analysis .. i think its called graphology or something. someone did that to me once - analyze something i wrote on a tissue paper .. a date actually. she was right on most counts .. but then she didn't need to see my handwriting for saying all that i guess.

enough blabbering for a day. back to the movie .. cassandra's dream. woody allen movie.

i like it so far :)

writing -- charles bukowski

often it is the only
thing
between you and
impossibility.
no drink,
no woman's love,
no wealth
can
match it.
nothing can save
you
except
writing.
it keeps the walls
from
failing.
the hordes from
closing in.
it blasts the
darkness.
writing is the
ultimate
psychiatrist,
the kindliest
god of all the
gods.
writing stalks
death.
it knows no
quit.
and writing
laughs
at itself,
at pain.
it is the last
expectation,
the last
explanation.
that's
what it
is.

the happiest place in all the world - my bed

aah the simple pleasures of life ..

of lying in bed with aching limbs and a happy heart.

of letting a song do what it does
and give in to sweet reveries

of being in love
with no one
but being in love
still

:)