A few good hours ago, I trudged to my bed - tired and full of longing - for sleep. I haven't had my usual fill for the past few weeks and it seems I have kinda gotten used to it. Now I am even beginning to wonder if I slept a little too much all my life. Not that I can do much about it .. for what's done is done. Can't un-sleep my precious happily slept-through days and nights now. :)
So I put on some music and now I can't sleep. Or I couldn't sleep so I put on some music. Don't remember in what order but now I can't sleep at all. And I don't mean it in a bad way - not at all. Too much going on in my mind - not all connected, not all coherent. But at the heart of it all I feel alive and I register everything. And no I am not on drugs. :) . So I was saying .. yeah, the moment feels like a slow unspooling of all my summer memories. Also someone forgot to switch off their lights in the next building. I have this sudden urge to record everything that's happening right now. Just gave up - there is not much happening out there. The world is asleep and so is my dog. He makes these twitching movements as if he is running in his dreams .. chasing someone maybe. I wonder if it's mice or cats or maybe it's that golden haired beauty he meets on the street. I think this would make a great short film.
Okay. Guess "the slow unspooling of all my summer memories" was a promising start but then I went off track. It's a little like .. you see your life for what it was/is and accept everything. Love everything. Fear nothing. Like if that's possible at all, or maybe it is but only in fleeting moments like this. Anyway now I can't go back there .. maybe a subject for another post. Looking forward to life in general. And no, I am not on drugs :)
Hmmm. Just in case this post might have stopped making sense already, I should seriously reconsider falling asleep. :)
P.S: Last weekend I bought a shining new pair of jogging shoes to go with my shining new resolution to get fit. Again :). Also I am real proud of my new dvd acquisitions.